Threesomes make great stories, and they usually offer a view into humanity that you cannot get elsewhere. But these escapades are risky, too. Aside from the awkward logistics (Who puts what where? When do I get to do that? What’s poking me?), there is the inevitable resentment that at least one person feels during and after, particularly when an established couple is involved. Somebody feels slighted and sometimes as though their mate has been unfaithful.
The first time I had sex with a girl was when her boyfriend was there too. At the time it seemed like the only way to get to her, so I agreed. I was able to pretend he wasn’t there for about 10 minutes, until his hairy arm appeared in the periphery and ruined it. Eventually they broke up and she became my girlfriend, but that threesome took a lot of romance out of our courtship. The only other threesome I had was with twin brothers, which, in hindsight, is disgusting. But they were hot and I was doing drugs. It wasn’t very satisfying, especially since the house we were in set fire shortly after we began and we had to escape out the 2nd floor window. But “I did it with the
FLOYD [the friend who wants me to fuck his girlfriend and subsequently, himself] & I talked about the threesome a bit more after a few drinks at a very late hour. He buttered me up with compliments, and assured me that his girlfriend is ‘amazing’ in bed. But in the end I told him ‘no thanks.’ It makes for a decent story regardless.
