Over the Phone: Attempt #1

I was watching porn the other night and I thought I ought to call up PIZZA [The long distance T.V. guy]. What better way to initiate phone sex than to announce that I'm watching porn?

ME: Hi.
HIM: Hey! what are you up to?
ME: I'm watching porn.
HIM: Whoa.... Tell me everything.
ME: Well...
HIM: Wait! [a door closes, muffled man's voice in background] I'm back. Sorry. My dad's visiting.